Thursday, August 30, 2012

Lost Artists Spotlight: The Aforementioned Wiener

Lost Artists, those musicians and performers that have slipped through the cracks, are a sad tragedy, but Abstruse Decapod aims to help bring these forgotten souls of entertainment back to the people whenever possible. One such venerable flash in the pan is below:

Yes ladies and gentlemen, you have finally found it! Its not a dream, this ... this is the Real Deal -- this is ... The Aforementioned Wiener!

The Aforementioned Wiener

Historical Notes
The members of The Aforementioned Wiener range in age but their total age is 87 as of April 2002, so fans know that there is a lot of experience and dedication behind this obscure but unstoppable band with the unlikely name.

Starting out as simply a few random words on a piece of paper at a bakery in northeast Oklahoma, The Aforementioned Wiener, consisting of friends and a few relatives, slowly pulled itself out of the creative sludge and started performing and doing gigs at area high schools, civic centers and the occasional bar and rodeo, learning valuable life lessons and fighting injustice where they found it.

TAW was given their shot by the visionary label, Fat Orange Records, in early 2002, and the group's demo CD, "Longer Than The Bun", was a cult hit among Fat Orange staff, though admittedly none of the songs were deemed worthy of airplay. Nonetheless, the band was determined and their drive and ability to get coffee and danishes and repair Xerox machines eventually lead to Fat Orange Records' risky move of hurling The Aforementioned Wiener down the throats of the public at large (pardon the pun) and signing the band - a move which is responsible for the occasional murmer still overheard in the Fat Orange halls to this day.

After paying their dues and interning with and opening for some of Fat Orange Records' larger and more well-known artists, such as Strontium-38, Animal Spouse and Jesus With Earplugs, the other artists, impressed by the Wiener's spirit, invited them to open at Fat Orange Records' first multi-artist event, the "Does This Look Infected?" tour, which was exactly the break the group was looking for, as just this limited exposure caused their popularity to skyrocket, with some fans pointing to the band's stirring rendition of "La Cucaracha", which featured a truly jaw-dropping guitar solo by Jesus With Earplugs.

The Aforementioned Wiener is ready to rock out on their own, with their very own freshman effort, a double CD debut album, Second Skin / On The Inside. It took a lot of fast-talking and not a few greased palms among Fat Orange executives to pull off such a huge production for an unproven band, but TAW stuck to their guns and snubbed their noses at a CD single, insisting "if you're gonna debut, debut as big and as loud as you can" - this rallying war cry from the group's lead singer, Jat Rak, was enough to make the execs throw up their hands and give TAW the nod.

Longtime and hardcore fans of the band will be glad to know that a few of the most popular tracks from their debut CD made it onto their debut album, digitally remastered and in some cases remixed with a new driving intensity, so if you're already fans of The Aforementioned Wiener, sit back and check out their latest hijinx - if you're new converts, look around and familiarize yourself with their work - we know you'll never forget them!


Longer Than The Bun (Original Demo CD) - 2001
1. Peanut Butter and Crabs
2. Longer Than The Bun
3. Pelvic Light Switch
4. Lemur Juice
5. Another Lovely Day For Kraut

Second Skin / On The Inside (Double CD Debut) - 2002 Fat Orange Records
CD 1:

  •   1. Fishes and Oafs
      2. Drugs and Dragons
      3. No Respect For Bananas
      4. Blessed With A Big Pickle
      5. Hot Phalanges
      6. Nipple Fish (Live In These Waters)
      7. Gramma Parks Funky
      8. Airborne Tadpoles
      9. Don't Bump It, Shake It or Sniff It (Anthrax Mix)
    10. Homosexual Garden Gnome
    11. Ridin' The Short Bus Of Love
    12. (Its a) Short Bus Christmas
    13. Pimping Out Cody
    14. Genuine Nemesis Genesis
    15. Christmas Weed
CD 2:
  • 16. Original Girl
    17. Agile For A Fat Guy
    18. Get Sheet Off
    19. Ice Cream Gloves/Clones
    20. Gay And Mad
    21. Biggest Pygmy
    22. Keep Your Knife Wet and Warm
    23. Cleaning For My Dad
    24. Natural Rat Poison
    25. Rusted Tanks and Fat Dragoons
    26. Enhance Your Clam
    27. Bad With A Foil
    28. Shooting Bugs On The Floor
    29. Can't Stand A Soggy Biscuit

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